If you want to know the top moments of our 2019, you're in the right place.
I'm late in posting because I've come back here so many times in an attempt to wrap up our year in a nice little package. And then I remembered that nice packages are overrated. We all know it's what inside the package that counts. So here's the package - it's like the wonky gift that doesn't fit in a bag and so I just roll it up in newspaper and call it done.
2019 was a big year.
Looking back at these photos from 2019, I feel like I'm looking at memories that happened 3 years ago. It's still a whirlwind, and I feel like I'm still recovering from some of it.
But here it is, my top adventures of 2019.
1. TRYING NEW THINGS!
What's that thing we used to say? Oh that's right, Carter CAN. Lest we forget. Let's say it again, all together now: Carter CAN.
Other new things include the baby of the family moving to his big-boy bed. Remember that post I did about saying goodbye to the family crib? (Read it HERE)
Well, the crib is being used by someone very special to us - sweet baby Nora Lane. My niece, their cousin, my brother's baby girl.
Other new things: Macy diving in to writing and drawing and reading, Silas figuring out his big-guy bike, Carter embracing things like drawing, building legos, and playing pretend with his siblings, Macy trading her nap time for quiet book time in her room, Silas staying in his bed until it's time to get up (instead of bursting into his day at 4am!) and so much more.
2. TOGETHERING!
This year might have solidified the bond the five of us have. We spent a lot of time together - making decisions together, talking about our decisions together, actually doing our decisions together...and feeling it all - together.
Our kids love each other. They like playing together, and miss each other when they're apart.
They root for and cheer each other on. When one is sad or struggling, they huddle up and try to figure out how to help.
They also argue and grab toys and take jabs. Don't think it's all rainbows and unicorns over here (although, we currently have a crap-ton of unicorns in our home...if you have a daughter between the ages of 2 and 10, you likely understand).
It's becoming obvious to Macy that Carter struggles with things like language and showing he understands. She asks questions, and then tries new things with him. "Mom, maybe Carter will like it if I do it this way!" or "Carter, what do you need?". She's learning him, and then teaching us what to do.
Sometimes togethering looks like late nights at the beach with a grill and burgers! Those moments are so sweet and will be ingrained in our kids memories forever.
Other times, togethering looks like sitting by the fireplace with a book and a cookie.
3. CREATING!
I've been learning to give up control so there's room for creativity. This sounds nice and freeing, but it's been hard for me! I don't like clutter or messes or projects that don't go as planned.
Recognizing that cleaning up is part of the process has been good - it doesn't all fall on my shoulders.
Also, the end product isn't important! Let them create! Give them the time and space to figure it out!
It might take us twice as long to make pizza if I let them help. The floor might be covered with ingredients that ought to be in the bowl. But they're learning!
So much of the time, my role in helping my kids create is to stand back and let it happen.
And guess what? Usually what comes out of it is better than anything I could have planned or controlled.
This was a big part of our 2018, too. (Read more HERE)
This year I think we took it to the next level.
Perhaps our biggest adventure of the year started with this:
This is Carter on his first day of school. New school. New district. Teachers, aides, and peers he's never met. A building he's never stepped foot inside.
Carter CAN.
Carter CAN.
CARTER CAN!
These were times filled with big-feelings. We took lots of walks to talk things out and feel all of it. Our kids participated. They know why we switched schools, and they have feelings about it, too.
But they also know, maybe even more than we do, that Carter Can. We'd turn our world upside down for this young man who we owe so much to.
Eventually, our decision to switch schools led to moving to a different city. This was not part of the plan. This was not part of my plan.
Adventuring sounds fun and, well, adventurous. But sometimes it feels like your heart being ripped out and trampled on.
This was a beautiful, hard, incredible, intense season for me. THANK GOD I had so many people in my life walking me through it. Sometimes they held my hand as I walked along slllooooowwwwllly, sometimes they grabbed my face in their hands and spoke hard things to me. All of it was love. But what I wanted was hope. I wanted to know that everything was going to be okay.
The hope came as an effect of doing the hard things.
Thanks, countless people. You who sat in my living room and asked me questions. You who took long walks with me as I processed it all out. You who laid in bed with me at night and let my cry and curse and cry. You who have helped me countless times over the past 12 months to say "I forgive them. I forgive them. I forgive them."
I forgive them. And I have so much hope.
5. FIGURING IT OUT!
Without vacations, without weekend getaways, without date nights (seriously, I think we've had one date in the past eight months) - we've intentionally carved out time from our schedules to figure life out. I used to think we needed special stickers on the calendar for those things.
Turns out, we don't!
We've processed our day, set up the week ahead, talked through hard feelings, and so much more - in the early hours of day and late at night after the kiddos head to bed.
A big part of this season has been using the brains God gave us to think about what's best for our family, instead of just going with the status quo.
Who told us we have to do things this way or that way?
What do WE want for our kids?
How do we get there?
Let's do THAT.
We are an amazing team. We're learning how to be an even better team. After almost 14 years of marriage (yes, that's right - I counted several times to be sure) we still don't have it all figured out.
We still get to learn and grow together! There's no end in sight, and that's so satisfying. Being married will never be boring. There are always exciting things ahead.
6. LOVING UNIQUELY!
Just like last year, we're learning who are kids are and how to love them best.
As they grow and their struggles become greater, we have more opportunity to understand them. We've been given more opportunities to love them based on who they are and what they need.
One of them thinks only of himself and what he needs in a moment. What a joy to adjust to him and help him move forward!
One of them is always looking for a need to fill, and will create one if necessary. What a gift to offer examples of slowing down to make more with what I'm given, instead of creating things on my own!
One of them will do whatever it takes to move people around! What a treat to help him reach his goals and execute his plans!
Parenting. It's not for the weak or faint of heart. It's dirty work and most days I go to bed feeling like I'm covered in dirt from head to toe.
But then, I see little sprouts begin to come up here, and little leaves unfurling there, and suddenly the hours spent in the dirt make so much sense.
Parenting is a long-game. And we're all-in.
Together.
That's our 2019. Maybe it was the year of leveling up. Taking what we learned last year, and going a step farther. Each level gets harder, and that goes against what I always thought life would be. Doesn't it get easier and easier until I retire, and then I can have a life of relaxation and comfort?
Ugh. That sounds awful.
Bring it on. Let's keep leveling up.
Together!
If you want to check out our past year-end posts, you can find them here:
2018
2017
2016
2015
2014
2013
2012
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