Moses.

It's done.  After over two months of being terribly ill, Moses is asleep.  For good.

I can't even tell you how Jake and I have agonized over this decision.  Moses first showed us he was sick the week before Thanksgiving.  He mouthed his food and dropped it - which was so out of character for this oink of a dog.  We thought he had a tooth problem, and it wasn't until the diarrhea started that we started to worry.

{Yes, I said diarrhea.  I'm sorry.  Diarrhea has been our life for over eight weeks.  The word no longer makes me squirm.}

Weight started melting off of him, and we knew we had a serious problem.  The doctor did her best to diagnose him, but just couldn't figure out what the problem was.  We put him on every medication - every treatment - even did an exploratory surgery.  Nothing helped.

Eventually his appetite dwindled to nothing, and his hips started bothering him.  Jake did a Google search, and came up with something called Addison's Disease.  He called the vet, and she agreed this was a likely diagnosis.

We never did the testing for Addison's.  The vet believed it was Atypical Addison's, because it didn't present on lab work like Addison's usually does.  Atypical Addison's is very costly to treat, and treatment would be life-long.

That just wasn't an option for us.  And we had to make a decision.  So we did.

Monday, we agreed, would be the day.  Why wait until Tuesday?  Why delay the inevitable?

As I was doing the dishes Monday afternoon, Moses slithered off the couch and assumed his position - directly behind me, back against my legs.  This is something he hadn't done in many weeks.  It felt so...normal.  And I knew it would be the last time.  No more slobbery kisses - no more walks - no more trips to St. Germain - no more chasing bunnies - no more food sneaks from the counter.  Break my heart.

I always imagined Moses growing old and gray with Carter by his side.  They were meant to be buds, and now....well, you know.

This picture.  Oh, this picture.
Taken in St. Germain this past summer, Jake made it into a canvas for my birthday.
It hangs in our living room now.  Sweet Moses - next to his buddy - looking off into the distance.
Break my flippin' heart.

It was time, and Moses was such a trooper.  He laid so nice while the tech's made several attempts at finding a vein.  He didn't even blink when they had to stick him over & over.  Dude knew it was time.  Finally, they found a vein and the doctor came to inject him.

Moses got up - looked around - and gently fell right into his daddy's arms.  And that was it.

We sat there for a few minutes, and pet our little furry friend.  Every bone in his body stuck out, every rib was traceable.  This is not our Moses.  This is not the Moses we'll remember.

+++++

In all of this, I've been looking for the good.  I found it.  Here it is.  On Monday, we said goodbye to our dog.

Our dog.  Not our child.

Thank you, Lord.  It could be so much worse.  The pain we've experienced has been gut-wrentching.  Because of the love we had for our dog.  Our dog.  Not our child.  We are so, so blessed.

It could be so much worse.  It can always be worse.

And that's all I care to say about that.

One Thing I Know For Sure: "The average dog is a nicer person than the average person." - Andy Rooney